Monday, February 3, 2014

Game Summary: Game 56 - Losing is in Overtime is the Pitts

by Bonk's Mullet


Coming off a stupid, no good, ugly, dumb, gross game to the Toronto Maple Leafs, Ottawa was looking to rebound against Taylor Pyatt and the Pittsburgh Penguins. Given that the playoff race is so tight, earning even a point against the Penguins would be huge the the Sens. Calling it a playoff "race" is probably a stretch; it's more of a playoff slow-moving queue at the bank, but without the free coffee.

Do I know how to sell hockey or what?

Kassian was out, and Da Costa was in, but I can't imagine that having any real importance (Spoiler: It took 10 minutes for my prediction to be falsified). Mark Stone is still out with an injury and Joe Corvo is still out without a shirt.

MacLean elected to start Craig Anderson in goal, forgoing the obvious choice:

1st Period

  • Six minutes in, Brendan Sutter gets robbed by Anderson's glove hand. Originally I was going to try to come up with jokes for every one of Anderson's amazing saves tonight, but I'm not prepared to write the Sens blog version of Beowulf.
  • Jared Cowen gets a prime scoring chance in the slot, but it's stopped before it even gets to the net thanks to the collective force of the laughter emanating from the Penguins back end. Spezza impulsively giggles from the bench.
  • Zibanejad breaks up a Penguins scoring chance before producing a scoring chance at the other end of the ice only seconds later. Sweden's Olympic management team is outraged to learn of the IIHF's "no take backsies" rule.
  • On their most recent road trip, the Pittsburgh Penguins took the team mothers on a "moms trip" instead of the traditional "dads trip." Not everyone was impressed though:
  • Speaking of bloggers, Malkin's sweaty hands bobble the puck away on a partial breakaway.
  • Deep in the Penguins zone, Da Costa fakes like he's going to skate the puck to the point before suddenly circling back, causing two Penguins to crash into each other. 
This isn't that play but it's close enough and it makes me laugh more.
  • Da Costa takes the opportunity to drive to the net before going high short side to make it 1-0 Sens. Horrible puns by the local media ensue.

  • Smith gets called for shoving Malkin head first into the boards behind the Senators net. Fans jump up from their seats shouting, "KADRI WASN'T CALLED FOR IT LAST GAME BUT I ACKNOWLEDGE THAT EVERYONE, EVEN REFEREES, ARE ALLOWED TO MAKE MISTAKES AND I FORGIVE THEM FOR THAT."
  • On the power play, an Olli Määttä point shot is deflected by Brian Gibbons to tie the game up at 1-1, which in my opinion, was Olli a Määttä of time. /pauses for laughter...silence
  • Zack Smith and Robert Bortuzzo drop the gloves. Upon further inspection, Robert Bortuzzo is in fact a stretched out Todd Bertuzzi with a pencil mustache and purple overalls.

2nd Period

  • To start off the period, Marc Andre Fleury bobbles a Kyle Turris shot behind himself into the crease. Unfortunately the Penguins had trained extensively on Erik Condra game tapes and swiftly swept the puck to the corner.
  • On what can only be described as a glitch in the system, Eric Gryba somehow gets set loose on a breakaway. I don't want to be too harsh on the defensive defenseman, but let's just say that accuracy on the shooting range doesn't translate to hockey.
  • Bobby Ryan, mid-scoring slump, squeezes his stick so hard that it shatters in half.
  • Meanwhile, this is still happening:
  • A high sticking penalty is given to Neil. On the ensuing PP, a scoring chance is recorded by Neal. I decide to kneel on an eel. 
  • Cowen's dump-in attempt is blocked, then he whiffs on the clearing attempt, then he trips on a banana peel, then he loses his car keys, then he forgets his mother's birthday, then he knocks over a movie set backdrop, then he reveals state secrets, then he
  • Da Costa stuffs Crosby on a scoring chance at the end of the period. "Pfft. Dempsters?" scoffs Da Costa, chewing on a three foot long baguette.

3rd Period

  • Please flip to page 578 of Craig Anderson's Beowulf. He's making all kinds of crazy saves.
  • About 8 minutes into the period, Erik Karlsson is set up with a glorious chance in front. He is robbed by Marc Andre Fleury:
via Pensburgh.com
  • If you watch carefully, MAF's save appears to re-injure Karlsson's achilles.
Karlsson seems oddly okay with this. Thanks @aaront for the GIF.
  • Feeling inspired by the save, the Penguins decide to jump to the defense of their goaltender:
See also: Penguins bloopers
  • The ensuing Sens power play was so horrible that I'm not positive the Penguins didn't continue to play with 8 players.
  • I hope you're still playing Craig Anderson incredible save highlights in your mind because they're still happening.
  • Time for...

Overtime

  • Before you could even say "consolation point," Jason Spezza is out-muscled for the puck, Greening goes off for a change, and Gryba caught out of position, allowing James Neal to score on a Bortuzzo rebound.

The End Words

As I said in the intro (check out that continuity), the Sens most likely leave happy with a point. They were totally dominated by the Penguins all night, safe for some solid shifts by Conacher-Da Costa-Condra and Michalek-Spezza-Zibanejad. Despite everyone warning him otherwise, Craig Anderson made the odd decision to stand on his head all night. I'm surprised that worked out for him. Cranderson had no chance on the deflection on the first Penguins goal and was hung out to dry by his teammates for the overtime winner.

Anderson threw his teammates under the bus for their defensive coverage last game, so Anderson will likely have to find something bigger this time. Two buses? A plane? His goals against average? Heyo!

Olli a Määttä of time. I crack myself up. See you all tomorrow!
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